America's Most Critical Journal since 1999
Trump’s Big Beautiful Amendments to the 10 Commandments By David Comfort And it came to pass that, after the Burning of the Bush, the MagaMoses called down his 47 Plagues on Sleepy Joe and the wicked Dem Deep State Sith Lords. Freezing FEMA, the CDC, and Ker... More »
New Federal Holidays for the 21st Century By Martin H. Levinson Jan. 6: Patriots Day Patriots Day honors the heroic men and women who fearlessly assaulted the US Capitol on January 6, 2021 in a righteous coup attempt to reverse a rigged election and restore Do... More »
An Open Letter to GenZers by Mollie Fermaglich Hey, GenZers! It’s not unusual for younger generations to create slogans and slang particular to their generation. As a Baby Boomer, I’ll allow you a few seconds to shout, “Okay Boomer!” I can deal w... More »
More Purging Please By Martin H. Levinson In his 1981 inaugural address, Ronald Reagan said, “government is not the solution to our problem, government is the problem.” President Trump, channeling the Gipper, has asked DOGE to solve that problem by putting... More »
Most are aware of the fact that Donald Trump has been making a number of changes to the White House, including, as Newsweek pointed out about the Oval Office, “…some of the most extensive changes to the room’s appearance in modern presidential history, a... More »
by Tom Deisboeck “Alrighty, then let’s bomb Jemen, Boys!! but first make sure there’s no leak anywhere.” Get the book! The Satirist - America's Most Critical Book (Volume 1) The Satirist: America's Most Critical Book Amazon Ads N... More »
I Have a Dream By Martin H. Levinson (An excerpt from an upcoming State of the Union address composed by Donald Trump after MLK’s “I Have a Dream” speech appeared to him in a dream.) Members of Congress, Supreme Court Justices, and everyone else here, I ... More »
The Geographic Name Game By Martin H. Levinson President Trump has signed executive orders naming the Gulf of Mexico as the Gulf of America and the Alaskan mountain Denali as Mount McKinley. He could make other name changes to help restore America’s greatnes... More »
More Leaked Texts from Signal by Stephen Lyons DATELINES: Hawaii, Kremlin, Greenland, Starbuck’s, Chick Fil A, Palm Steakhouse At 11:44 p.m., Hegseth posted in the chat, “NEED DRINKY! ASAP!” The text beneath this began, “TIME NOW 12:11 a.m.: Weather is... More »
The Smell of Success & Determination: Musk’s Burnt Hair vs. Trump’s Fight Fight Fight! by David Comfort Power guys have loved colognes since ancient times. Alexander the Great and Mohammad wore woody musks from the anal glands of Himalayan bucks. The C... More »
Who’s That Sitting at My Daddy’s Desk? by Paul Lander and Dan McConnell Paul Lander is a TV comedy writer, award-winning columnist and producer. His humor pieces have appeared in MAD, American Bystander, Weekly Humorist, McSweeneys, National Lampoon, Robot... More »
Kiss the Federal Government Goodbye By Martin H. Levinson Elon Musk and his merry band of muskrats are doing their best to trim excess fat from the US government by suggesting ways to fire federal employees. The problem is they’re being too conservative with... More »