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Essays

See classic essays: A Modest Proposal to Convert Shopping Malls into Prisons and Smoking as Religion and other examples of satirical essays.

See other long-form satires and satirical news.

135 posts

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No Fly, No Fry, No Pie . . .

Published 3y ago -

By Martin H. Levinson The U.S. military has had great success setting up no-fly zones over the lands of foreign enemies. So maybe we should unleash the power of the military over domestic foes. Here are some ideas on how to do this. I. The fight against obesit... More »

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Five Common Biases That Block Clear Thinking

Published 4y ago -

By Martin H. Levinson A cognitive bias refers to systematic errors in one’s thinking. Such biases can skew our perceptions and impair our ability to think clearly. The following five cognitive biases are particularly harmful to rational thought. The calamity... More »

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Finding a Nickname for President Trump

Published 4y ago -

Among his other qualities, the president has a homing instinct for slapping nicknames on his perceived enemies, who include much of the world. Since most Democrats outgrew this habit during middle school, they seem to be at a loss to return the favor. In part ... More »

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Unmasking the Truth

Published 4y ago -

By Martin H. Levinson To stop the spread of the coronavirus the CDC wants everyone to wear a mask. Well CDC, I’m not going to do it because like Patrick Henry, when it comes to government decrees my motto is “Give me liberty or give me death!” I’d rath... More »

Which Political Leader is Described?

Published 4y ago -

by Jeffrey Meyers “He never worked in the accepted sense of the word.  He never read any books or magazines and never felt any need to.”  “An utter ignoramus, he was barely literate and did not like to study problems in detail.”  “In later years, ... More »

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Masking: the Cool Factor

Published 4y ago -

The Cool Factor—possessed by some, recognized by all—could help us defeat COVID-19 and, quite possibly, future pandemics. Before I get to the virus that’s been attacking our lungs, heart, kidneys, vascular system, taste/smell, and sanity, I’d like to t... More »

The Center Will Not Hold

Published 4y ago -

The signs are everywhere. A man walks into a Subway in North Carolina carrying an AT-4 anti-tank rocket launcher and two sidearms. No tanks are in the vicinity. He is there to get a sandwich. And maybe a bag of chips. Another man shops at a Vons grocery store ... More »

Let’s Not Make a Monumental Mistake

Published 4y ago -

By Martin H. Levinson Why the push to remove Confederate monuments? Those memorials were erected to honor brave American patriots who decided early on that the deep state was a threat to individual liberty and the best way to remedy that was to secede. And sec... More »

Watchdogs Gone Wild

Published 4y ago -

By Martin H. Levinson If you had an employee who was constantly gazing over your shoulder trying to get dirt on you would you fire that underling? Of course you would and so would Donald Trump who in the last few months fired four inspectors general (IGs) who ... More »

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Reopening’s Repercussions Reverberate

Published 4y ago -

by Boaz Dvir You may have heard—although, if you live north of the Mason-Dixon line, hardly noticed—that states have reopened many of their businesses, including frat houses, prisons, and stores deemed not-in-the-least-bit essential due to lack of billion-... More »

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How I Caught the Civil Disobedience Fever

Published 4y ago -

Friends, I have left my safe cocoon and ventured over to the dark side. What first triggered this odyssey was coming across the #FireFauci hashtag on Twitter. I decided to sit quietly in a room with comforting pillows and aroma therapy (vanilla spice), and fol... More »

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